you can't keep destroying yourself.
can't you see it's destroying me?
we're stuck here, in this place
it may not be a utopia
but it's not a dystopia yet
so lets try not to make it that way
i don't know how to convince you
that i love everything about you
for better or for worse
i can't make you love yourself
the way that i love you
my love for you costs me deeply
to be with you is worth it, but
i don't know if i can afford it
where you are, i can't be yours
i can't be me, in that reality
your dystopian dream girl
remember, things are never
as bad as they could be
we have the choice to make
or to break our lives
we're not indestructible
no, we're not immortal
but death isn't ready
to come for us yet
i want to see your world
but i'm not prepared for it
to destroy me, eventually
my time will come
but if you don't mind
i'd prefer to be
my own end, to choose
my own death, but first
i must choose this
windy whimsical world
so hold on tight
because this is going
to be quite the ride
however we feel is up to us
we can love it or hate it
but we can't get out
until we come to
a complete stop
[i wanted you to be there
beside me the whole time
to laugh with and hold my hand
during the scary parts]
but we must be brave
and face this desolation of ours
separate roller coaster rides
that we'll ride through
if you'd rather love that
misery more than yourself
then you'll never need me
i'll come back to you, to spite
bitter old man cynicism
with his heavy fist of doubt
he pounds inhibition into us
a blacksmith forging, shaping
the iron of indecisiveness..
the weight on every foot’s soul
born as red hot paranoia
i’m not that kind of horse
my hooves need no such shoes
i am too weak to carry
you on my back with all
my other heavy burdens
oh how i hate to unload
these beloved possessions
but i can't breathe in
these strangled obsessions
when the defeatists took over
i saved a bit of optimism
enough to live off
a rationale to ration
for the day that i would
meet someone real tall
it may not mean much to you
but i have some faith
in where i'll travel, i believe
in my inevitable return
i don't know if things can
change between you and i
if either of us could ever
be enough for you to love
i hate to have to leave you behind
it will kill me if you don't see
in this meaningless world
you still mean something
special to me
